Sunday, February 26, 2012

Tending the garden

I think winter might have taken a vacation this year. We had one little day of snow on the ground followed by 80 degree weather. I won't complain, though. This warm weather has me giddy about springtime, gin and tonics on the front porch, and little green blades of grass pushing up through the dirt. It reminds me of when Jon and I were just married.

He moved in first, a month before we were married. The house was ours, yet not quite mine. I wanted it to be, though, so I started gardening whenever I could. Soon, weed pulling became an addiction. I spent so so many hours when we were first married pulling them up.  It was both a stress reliever and a wonderful depiction of how I needed to get to weeding myself and the sin in my marriage. Man, do those suckers pop up fast, and if left to their own devices, will overrun the garden before long. 

I was so scared in the beginning. Scared that the weeds were creeping in and the growing pains of a new marriage would choke me out. It was a seemingly fragile thing. I don't think I realized just how scared and anxious I was back then until now. 

Now, I'm so darn happy. Free and happy. I don't have that silent twinge of still having something to prove. I don't feel afraid anymore. The Lord has grown us both so much in a year and a half. 

It's glorious and happy and I just love living life with my husbandman. Each day I realize a little more that I can't imagine living without him. 

Thank you, Lord, for freeing my heart from the fear of being unhappy. Thank you, Jon, for giving me every reason in the world to be confident about this love. Yes, there will always be weeds in need of pulling, but wherever we end up, I so thankful that I have you.


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